NATURE AWESOMENESS: ACID RAIN!

Hey pyscho…acid rain isn’t cool! But….It is kind of a toss up.  On the one hand we are killing rivers and trees and my aunt ethel. True, those are all horrible horrible things.  On the other hand it has the power to make statutes scream in acidy pain.  Which I only thought Professor X from The X Men could do.

 

Statue baby is hating life ... and why? Acid Rain. Nature is so badass.

You have to look at nature like a badass, pissed off neighbor.  He has to live next to annoying humans who won’t stop putting junk and space craft into his yard (the sky if you don’t get my image laden imagery).  So he makes acid fall from the sky.  Don’t get me started on Acid Guy from Robocop either, because soon we will all look like that guy, yes … I am sorta hoping for that.

You don’t understand.  Let Science picture explain.

 

Blah Blah Blah Science blah blah.... melting buildings? I'm sold.

I don’t see the big deal, nobody lives in nature anymore? That city looks A-Okay! Nice, We are good.

 

What I really want is an acid rain movie.  Probably be made by that 2012 guy.  Where people are melting and screaming in the streets while acid melts their faces.  Somebody would run outside with an umbrella to save their baby… who for whatever reason is hiding under a car.  The umbrella is slowly melting and acid dripping down on them.  It is just awesome.  Then Godzilla comes and eats New York and it will end.  I have no idea why I don’t run hollywood.  Did you know that when you spell check Godzilla you get goodwill? makes sense to me, because there is a little godzilla in all of us.  Yes, I have used that reference before…. and I will use it again.

Crap my car is melting… It is raining.

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Awesome Song of the Day #73

Interpol – Slow Hands

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ANIMAL AWESOMENESS: SABERTOOTH TIGERS!

Cats are awesome.  I know there are a lot of cat haters in the world.  I am not one.  I love kitties… (distant asshole voice yells, “why”).  Fair enough I will answer that question with another question.  Why arn’t cats awesome….?

I win debate club again.  Suck. It.

Plus you have to determine the radness of something by what it evolved from.  Birds = awesome, kids of velociraptors.  Humans = awesome, used to be monkeys.  Cats = awesome, yep sabertooth tigers.  Now take an animals that does what ever it wants to all day and give it giant fangs.  Fangs that are so awesome they were named after swords.

Ummmm yea... It is a deadly fast murderous walrus.

Here is the day of a Sabertooth Tiger.  Wake. Murder a Giraffe or T-Rex.  Eat it.  Nap for 18 hours.  Wake, tongue bath + some purring.  Killing resumes with a great white shark followed by a quick purrr sesh then another nap.  Everyday filled with bloody animal carcasses; fuck it’s friday today they would have eaten a hippopotamus or orange julius.

Did you know a Sabertooth has a sweet tooth? For your fucking skull. Science Proven!

Wonder what my tramp stamp is? Not anymore!

If I have do die.  Please let a Sabertooth Tiger eat my brains through my eye sockets…please.  Best funeral ever!

Oprah – “It’s so sad…how did he die?”

Bill Nye The Science Guy – ” Sabertooth ate his head”

Oprah – “Radical” —— Jump high five with Bill Nye.

I can dream can’t I…I can dream.

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Awesome Song of The Day # 62

Shout Out Louds – Tonight I Have to Leave

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DANGEROUS AWESOMENESS: QUICKSAND!

I must have been confused because I challenged this pile of sand to a race and it wasn’t quick at all, in-fact, I started running, fell into this sand and it ate me.  It was horrible! I had sand in my teeth for days and all jammed in my butt crack.  Finally a unicorn stuck it’s horn into this sandy hell and pulled me to freedom, then I road it up a rainbow and we napped on a cloud.

at least it didn't eat that guys hat

So I wanted to explore the anatomy of a quick sand trap.  I went to the backyard, took my toys out of the sand box and stood there.  NOTHING! What a jip.  So I put the hose on, stood there and Ruined my kicks (thats me the black president one) but that was about it.  No screaming terror death.  Again, weak + sauce.  So I built an underground river with a constant supply of new water and a lot of sand, two streams of water flow to the top to sink ya and lower dry sand to fuck you over and I successfully died that time!

nature hates humans. Which sucks cause I love nature. So unfair it is like high school all over again!

I am not gonna lie, liquid sand sounds impossible.  Like frozen space. Or pickled bananas.

So class review

Quick Sand is What : A Noun

Good.

Bye

Awesome Song of the Day #58

Adam Kesher – Local Girl (video…odd…song…great)

It’s my birthday! I may be gone a few day! Wish upon a star that I get that rocket ship I have been wanting!  DO IT I NEED IT!

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