Archive for monkeys


Posted in Animals, Awesome, awesome song of the day, awesomness, blog, comedy, Dork, Humor, Stuff, Stupid with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 19, 2010 by tsanda

I gotta say I am pretty big fan of branding.  Taking something and instead of just putting it in your garage for safe keeping, burning a symbol in it’s ass to show other people that it is yours.  We do this with cows a lot.  And by we I mean me. I have 37 cows in my backyard with NBDS branded on the side of their ass.  NBDS did I give away my initials? Nope. Don’t want you crazies stalking me, unless you own operation.  Cause I have honestly never played operation and I wouldn’t be mad if you broke into my house and were waiting for me naked in my bed room with operation and 50 candles.

NBDS is my brand. I put it on everything that is mine.  Like this banana.

Banana Brand

NBDS, Copywrite...the future? You bet your ass. 1.21 jiggawatts!

That is an awesomeness original.  You don’t believe me? Look it has my brand.  I like to brand bananas.  I have a lot of monkeys that live in the trees by my house.  Denver is a huge primate city, fyi.  You didn’t know that? Watch some discovery channel why don’t ya. I don’t want these monkeys stealing my bananas.  I also branded my dog Smmmeeeelllliiighhhh Samsanov, the monkeys would also try to eat him.  Or ride him which I am 100% okay with.

I didn’t use my initials. DAJ. cause thats just boring.  Dagwood Alberto Jasper. I mean who am I? A comic book character? Hispanic? A hick? All.

So to lower confusion and put my life values out there.  NBDS.  No Big Deal Son. Anytime anything happens, NBDS.  Cause it really is no big deal, (unless it’s this blog than of course it’s a huge deal) and Son. Cause calling people son it just the polite thing to do.  Wu Tang taught me that.


Monkey with banana

What the hell! That was my favorite nana!

Monkey eating banana


Baby monkey with banana

Ahhh! I can't be mad at you tiny adorable monkey. You can have Jake. (that's the name of that banana)

I am out of bananas.  But have some full and fat monkeys.  Looks like I will be eating monkey tonight!


Awesome Song of the Day #134

Big Boi

Hustle Blood

(not the best quality but song is just sooooo smooth)



Posted in Animals, Awesome, blog, Humor, Music with tags , , , , on December 13, 2009 by tsanda

I felt like today is a very lazy sunday.  Surfing the net for a picture of a monkey riding a giraffe sounded like a lot of work today.  I am in a coffee drinking music listening mood and to answer you question, yes I still looked for that picture and could not find one.  This was the best I could muster.  And by me I mean google images and by muster I do mean mustard the yellow condiment that is incredible on hotdogs.

Ehhh ehhh! Pretty sweet, but once you want a giraffe nothing else really satisfies

So, Bike For Three.  Consists of Buck 65, a canadian indie rapper, and Greetings from Tuskan, a belgium ambient producer.  I had previously never heard of Greetings from Tuskan but her music is awesome and his voice is perfect for this music.  The result is one of my favorite albums in a minute.  No mom, not a literal minute, minute is slang for a long time.  Mom, I know a minute is short but thats the point, its slang.  I know you don’t get it mom thats okay go back to your bridge game.  Yes I would like corn bread with dinner.  Thanks mom.

Here are some songs and links.

Rumor has it that Bike for Three! have never met each other.  She sends him the music and he writes and records lyrics and she mixes it.  Pretty cool huh?  I have never met John Stamos but I feel like we would be a good team.  I’m gonna send him some music.

Clocking out.


Posted in Awesome, blog, Food, happiness :), Humor, memories with tags , , , , , , , on November 15, 2009 by tsanda

At first when I learned the wonders of the english language I had no idea how popsicles could be a word.  How could Meriam Webster be crazy enough to combine those things?  On one hand we have: The picture on the left, gross old guy.  On the other hand the picture on the right…Killing/Farming tool.


Iggy pop does not make me want to put something into my mouth...



Come to think of it...this doesn't really make me want to put something in my mouth either... other than sharp rusty metal.






So when my mother, lovely lady she is, asked baby me.  Hey baby get your finger out of your nose and eat this popsicle.  Look of shear tear came over my face… I cried and said I don’t wanna put iggy pop holding a sickle into my mouth! WAHHHH!!!!! (a lot of crying ensued, then I got tired and napped)

Isn’t it weird that little kids love napping on carpet squares?  I mean holy shit.  You want to lay in a bed or on the couch they are basically like clouds but on the ground and you won’t fall through and die..

Little Kid – nope I’m good with a square of 1/4″ thin material that is actually kinda itchy.

Parent…  weird… whatever.

Sooooo. My mother went to the freezer, again my mind was blown, actually fucking blown.  How is iggy hanging out in my freezer?  And he better not be eating my mini pizzas.  That dick looks like he would eat my food in a heartbeat.  So she pulled out a box and opened a creamsicle.



This picture best describe who I am as a person ... a monkey ...



Ahhhhh sicle not sickle! Dumb me!  And Pop… like???? Yea that part still doesn’t make sense.  But whooo! It was wondrous, then my brain froze and I cried again, boy ohhh boy was I a baby.

Popsicles are good!  I just feel bad for the people who didn’t know the translation and actually put Iggy Pop in your mouth… you might want to Brush them teeth.


Awesome Song of the Day #71 (more el ten eleven)

El Ten Eleven – Sorry About Your Irony