FOOD AWESOMENESS: CALZONES!
Calzones. The word itself just warms your loins. It tingles your arm hairs doesn’t it? It cured your leukemia? Yea… didn’t think so they aren’t that incredible. But they are everything great about food all put in one little handy bread pouch. I hate wasting all my time messing around with forks and knives. Don’t even get me started on spoons! Those things make no sense.
Guy: You use them to scoop.
Me: Eyebrows raise gently. AHHH HOT DAMN!
Thanks again guy.
Calzone. Your loins are tingling again. I know.
Here is how you make one. Get a pen and paper. Start writing. Take a pizza now wrap it up in some bread. Done. Eat! Those fucking Italians are geniuses. Except Michelangelo that fucks a hack and a half. Which is nuts because milli vanilli were only full hacks! Not sure how to utilize this technology elsewhere. Burritos! Damn Mexico has been all over this trend for decades too!
Guy: I think burritos are centuries old.
Me: DAMN GUY! YOU’RE A FUCKING ENCYCLOPEDIA!
They are just so damn hot and juicy and saucey and pepporoniey and pizzaey. Words haven’t even been invented to describe what these fucking things taste like. Words like great, yum, tasty, neat, filling. Hmmm Merriem Webster is telling me those are real words. Tumreatilling. Which basically boils down to Tasty Yum Great and Filling all mixed together and wrapped in bread. Like a calzone. It’s the circle of life.
I was always wondering how all of those ingredients breath though.
Time to get Fat.
Awesome Song of The Day #87
Tears for Fears
Everybody wants to rule the World