VIDEO GAME AWESOMENESS: CASTLEVANIA!

Now don’t expect a lot of specifics because I haven’t played this in 15 years nor did I play any of the sequels but I do remember the name and that you are trying to kill Dracula.  P.S. why is Dracula not in the word spell check database?  I mean if I were Miriam Webster the first word I want to know how to spell is Dracula.  Followed closely by Kazoo.  I have a love hate relationship with Dracula on the one hand I love him. On the other I hate him.

Angry mob that was trying to kill dracula that is now pissed at me for my lack of specifics – “why do you love him”

Answer – His life is incredible.  He lives in a castle.  Super neat.  He is surrounded by undead slave women who only want to please and protect him.  I have to pay a lot of money for that kind of treatment and I usually only get herpes out of the deal.

Same mob slightly less angry – “okay fair enough, why do you hate him”

Answer – That jerk didn’t friend me on facebook.  He was to busy super poking Frankenstein and posting pictures of his camping trip with the Wolf Man.

Mob – “Okay we will go back to trying to kill Dracula, your off the hook….For now…”

Anywhoooo.  The main reason I love Castlevania (again another word that I am shocked is not in spell check), is the balls the main hero has.  I am going to kill bats, monsters, the undead and ultimately Dracula.  Van Pussing brings cross bows and magic bibles … all I need is whip.  Your going to whip Dracula to death? Yep Yeppers.  Aight good luck with that shit.  Can I have your X box when you die immediately. … And you Fight Fish people!

AHHH WHIP IT!

Way to much reading involved with this post sorry.  I promise not much more!  Last reason for loving it, I hope one of my days starts like this.

Dracula you are fucked. That whip is gonna sting like a bitch.

Reading Over.  Listening Beginning.

C ya!

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Awesome song of the day #63

Mark Mallman – Do you feel like breaking up?

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