MONSTER AWESOMENESS: WEREWOLVES!


So the google images is usually my best pal ever, since it saves me actually doing any work for this thing but today it totally ruined my day.  So I spent all day with a hard on for posting today, and I knew from minute 1 of today.  Well I guess not minute 1 that was right after midnight and I was busy eating T Bell and trying not to preemptively shit my pants.  See T bell makes me shitty, (which yes is an adjective, or adverb… whatever English language, you are super fucking tough…maybe its a dangling modifier or a square root…nope)  and back to me shitting myself.  So T bell is really high quality but gives me a gassy senstaion called shitting myself, my coworkers hate it, but my laundromat loves it… well they actually hate it to…but no big deal….what the crap am I talking about.

….

Ahh yea werewolves.  So at minute roughly 376 of today I got the idea of raving about how cool werewolves are….which granted they are.  The only proof you need is right here. Now you hopefully watched that trailer because it said…”it will blow your house down” and then a house blew up… now if this website made that trailer it would have said blow your house up… We just have a really special attention to detail. Like Steven Hawking…if he read at a 6th grade level…and colored….and used spirograph.

….

Ahhhhh and yea back to werewolves….so you don’t need much convincing of their awesomeness.  Once a month they become giant scary dog monsters and go kill and eat humans.  Awesome… and people can’t get enough of them…I go kill a couple hookers once a month and all of a sudden I am a horrible person…go figure.

So I wanted a shit ton of cool pics for my site to show off how sweet werewolves are….and all I get are these…the Gayest/stupidest/most retarded/fucking what the fuck pictures ever…..although I d probably wear the middle one as a shirt if i could….

1. Google Images Let Down #1

Ewwww...god is an asshole

Ewwww...god is an asshole

So I think okay beginners bad luck.  How about something down the page. And this Gem.

#2)

Yea its kinda queerish but its hilarious and you'd totally wear that shirt

Yea its kinda queerish but its hilarious and you'd totally wear that shirt

and #3, from color by numbers I am pretty sure.

Werewolves don't need Armor, they need bazookas or kazoos ...or both...

Werewolves don't need Armor, they need bazookas or kazoos ...or both...

Now don’t get me wrong, I still think werewolves are pretty kick ass….google just didn’t do it for me…these are horrible, well #2 is pretty fricken baller…

but then it dawned on me….like dawn.  That all I needed was just a little more Dog Soldiers in my life…and you need it to.

Kablaaawww...you head is not exploded...sorry and your welcome

Kablaaawww...you head is now exploded...sorry and your welcome

So this post officially makes about as much sense as this…

Hey Juggalos stop being fucking stupid and deliver my pizza already

Hey Juggalos stop being fucking stupid and deliver my pizza already

I want an otter pop

———

Awesome Song of The Day # 45 ( definitely not ICP )

Band of Horses – Cold Fame

—–

This post took me an hour…thats 57 minutes longer than normal.  Where does the time go…ahhhhh byyyyeeee

Advertisements

4 Responses to “MONSTER AWESOMENESS: WEREWOLVES!”

  1. I’m pretty certain the wolf in the second picture is depressed and planning to jump because no other wolves will hang out with him.

    You’re right…Google Images screwed you over.

  2. hey tsanda, love your blog it is hilarious! As you like werewolves so much, thought i would say “check out the trailer for Wolfman with benecioe del toro or whatever his name is. it looks cocking-ace! it’s not out ’til next year though 😦

  3. mattsmash…thanks for blowing me some kisses, much appreciated. As for the wolfman, del toro and hannibal lectur + werewolves…sold and sold some more….P.S. I hope your last name is really smash…and you yell MATT SMASH like the hulk…do they make matt smash gloves?

  4. haha, no but my name is a bastardization of ‘Hulk smash’ as i kept hurting people accidentally because i am quite big.

    Ps. i have some hulk smash gloves, which i pretend are matt smash gloves.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: