FOOD AWESOMENESS: HOT DOGS!


No matter what you call them, or which one is your favorite; Hot Dogs, Wieners, Chili Dogs, Cheese Dogs… yes, even Corn dogs. No matter what time or where you want to enjoy them; Cookouts, concerts, 7-11 at 2 am, breakfast, a wedding, work meeting, brunch, dinner, passover, the apocalypse or a moon landing.  Any time is a perfect time for a dog. 

 

BRINGS A TEAR TO THE EYE AND A RUMBLE TO THE TUMMY

BRINGS A TEAR TO THE EYE AND A RUMBLE TO THE TUMMY

They are (usually) pretty easy to eat. I mean the carrying case is part of the meal.  Not like a burrito which usually falls apart the second you look at one (skanks can’t keep their clothes on), or a burger where the condiments are always trying to escape from prison and shoot out the back of the bun on to your shorts, or white Nikes.  

Sometimes they do get a little out of hand and messy.  If you have never awaken from a wonderful nights sleep covered in crusty mustard and ketchup from your 2 for 2 hotdogs at 7-11… then you really haven’t enjoyed gourmet food experiences before… and I’d ask you to shut up.  

Now you’d think I would want to talk about the 4th of July hotdog eating championships… FUCK NO! That shit is gnarly.  

 

ALMOST MAKES ME WANT TO NEVER EAT A HOT DOG EVER AGAIN...ALMOST

ALMOST MAKES ME WANT TO NEVER EAT A HOT DOG EVER AGAIN... ALMOST

UGH, I immediately regret posting that picture… and inviting Joey Chesnutt over to my house for a hot dog eating competition…He got the meat sweats into my Lemonade and then had a meat seizure and hot dog bits exploded out of his nose.  I immediately ate those pieces…Don’t judge me…it was delicious…no big deal.

Hmmm odd tangent.  Lets ignore it.  Lets quickly look at the newest technology in the world of Hot Dogs!  What you ask? What else can they do? Plenty, when I can get a hot dog car I will be content.  Wait…there already is a hot dog car! damn you oscar!

 

What kind of gas mileage you ask? No gas it gets 45 miles per gallon on ketchup...very green.

What kind of gas mileage you ask? No gas! It gets 45 miles per gallon on ketchup...very green.

Okay, Wiener car. Check. Scientists … they can do anything.

1. Ketchup/Mustard Gun? Check.

 

A very delicious game of Russian Roulette is about to ensue (in my mouth)

A very delicious game of Russian Roulette is about to ensue (in my mouth)

2. Hot Dog Toaster? Check, Double Check!

 

HOW DO I NOT OWN THIS? I BET IT IS AT THE SHARPER IMAGE

HOW DO I NOT OWN THIS? I BET IT IS AT THE SHARPER IMAGE

And that is it. No more new technologies are available.  Ever.  Well maybe a hotdog bicycle. 

OUT!

——–

Awesome RIP to RON SILVER! (BAD GUY FROM TIME COP) You will be missed. ( I wonder if he died because his matter inhabited the same space as itself…if that doesn’t make sense to you then go watch Time Cop. NOW)

——–

AWESOME SONG OF THE DAY #10.

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